Reminiscing upon my college days, I had to remember a true story that my psychology professor told the class one time. While he was working towards his Ph.D. , a fellow classmate asked him if he would like to spend the Christmas break with her and her family, since he was far from home at the time. He gladly accepted her offer and they drove to her family during the break.
His classmate came from a somewhat poor family and region, which did not bother him. Upon arriving with his classmate at her home, the mother greeted him with warmth and hospitality. But then, the sister of his classmate came into the room singing “You may have a Ph.D., but you still ain´t got no J O B.”
My professor´s former classmate was quiet about the incident with her sister, because the sister was right in that what she had said. The sister´s motivation, however, was degrading in that she expressed that thought in front of strangers. Second of all, the sister did not see the sense in her sister studying for a higher education. Such ideas were a waste of time and money in the eyes of this particular family. In other words, the values of this family were actually holding themselves back from being more prosperous in life and their futures.
I remember, from my own experiences, a former colleague of mine telling me something like, “I was born poor, and I will die poor.” What a stupid thing to say!
I believe strongly that our words have a lot of power, which many people do not understand. That means that whatever I speak, I have given it power to become true. When I think about it, that gives me a very large responsibility as towards what I say and think.
Think about this; if you express love, you may not necessarily receive love in return. But if you express hate, you will definitely receive hate in return from most people. After all, you get what you sow.
Getting back to the topic of breaking the chains, it is a two sided coin. Are my words and actions putting chains on somebody? As my children were very young, I would say “yes”. But today, I almost have the urge under control. Of course their mother has a lot further to go.
Perhaps you are an employer. Are you giving your people the freedom and the tools to do the job? Or are you a blue or white collar worker who is afraid a another colleague looking better that you? Are you helping that person to develop like you would hope that he would help you? Or are you putting chains on your coworkers?
Or are you frustrated because you see the mountain to climb, but you are just not getting there, or getting there fast enough? Of course we all have chains in one form or another. Mortgage, bills, family, car, sickness, etc. are also chains we have to carry as well as our past experiences and our upbringing. They may hold us back, too.
No matter if we were raised to be winners, fighters, survivors, or whatever; if there is something worth reaching for, should we not work hard to get it? Only the very few have it served to them on a silver platter.
Those are my thoughts, and I would be interested in reading yours´too. But no whining!
